Category: Writing

250 pages and interview done!!!

So today I hit 250 pages and that is a monumental amount for me….

I’m 30 pages in to my 2nd edit and I have finally told my reader who will read my final draft. Next step, finish edit, reader, then final touches and then search is on….

Well the large interview done and feel overwhelmed that so many people read it and shared by amazing friends, family, people who have experienced the foster system or my followers, thank you all!!

I am thankful that I have such amazing people in my life personally or socially!!!

Thank you as well to my coworkers and of course ashley and Tristan for sharing your amazing story!!

Goodnight all and I shall have sweet dreams!!

The closeness of close

So the editing #2 is going like a freight train on a smooth track and all is well in the passengers world. Its so much faster since I am not doing as much and so the finish line is right around the corner.

Do I dare perceive to say that I am almost to my dream of dreams? To be able to work full time as a writer. To be able to afford to pay the bills and have a savings account? To feel that all my life the talk of being a writer and actually being one is actually happening?

The day I was into a room, whether my book shelf, my mother, sisters, the library whatever and see my books, is the day I know I have made it.

The excitement is almost scary.

 

Editing #1 is done!!

Well the 1st edit and correction is finally done. So tomorrow starts the 2nd full read of my book, edit page 1 by 1 and reedit as I go. Excited yet definitely terrified of finishing because then there’s no exscuse…ready or not here comes the rejections.

I keep thinking that even the best authors got rejected as well so hey if they got rejected then ok….I know my story is awesome.

So I’m almost ready world, tomorrow is the beginning of an end, also in a couple days I’ll be posting the interview of the sisters and I’ll of course keep all of you with me on this journey..

Thank you all

The Day That I Don’t Write=-[

There comes a time in a young or in my case old writers life that we don’t write for one day. One day where my husband thinks I need a break or my son needs my attention a little more then usual. Or I am sick, whatever it is, means I don’t write.

When a person diets, its best to take at least one day eating something you enjoy.

When a person exercises, you take a day to rest.

When you’ve been up all day, a person sleeps.

So why not take a break from writing?

Anyone know why?

To make money? To waste time on writing something that wont make a difference?

The answer, and I bet most of you know is………..the love of it.

To see the story that flows from your mind, on paper, computer, whatever it is, its like jumping out of the plane, thousands of feet in the air. Its like sex with your soul mate for the hundredth time. Its like the best piece of chocolate or a warm bath after a really crappy day.

What is that? I have always wondered about where that love comes from. Its almost like a mothers love for her children. My book is like that feeling, a feeling of total and undeniable love. When I think about writing, about not writing, during writing, after writing.

For years I put my pen down… every day it sucked my soul a little at a time. Have you felt that way as well… Is not to write like being in love with a soulless man or woman?

When I am told to take a break or I have to take a break its suffocating. Even if I wrote everyday for 8 hours per day— i would be ok with that.

Writing is my space to my balls

My princess to my bride

My Stephen to my king

Writing I love……..

Good nite and sweet dreams!!

Short blog and hey guess what??

So sitting in my car, not wanting to go in my apt. Night sky is clear, Michael Jackson Billie Jean’s on, and 70° weather.. feeling pretty good

I’m starting an interview blog every week, because I like to see how people react to one on one, getting mighty personal.. plus I am starting off with two sisters who at first seem sweet, naive, and new….

But to my pleasant surprise they are intelligent, complex, serious and mostly kinda perverted and dark…

So Monday will be the interview…enjoy..nite all..drink one me all!!

Homeless thoughts?

This gentlemen is one of many vets that are homeless, in a pretty decent neighborhood at a corner, by a million or billion dollar hospital. Does every homeless person have a story? Do they have sob stories about after the war and coming home to a country that literally turned their back on them? Or are they millionaires trying to make more money?

Is the thought that the homeless are really rich people make it a reason to not give them something?

Why did I take a picture of this Vet? Because this man is the symbol of failure in our eyes and even though he or she probably lived a life of saving someone, or maybe losing a family, addiction, job loss, millions of reasons that they got were they are now, no matter what success they have had this is the moment that matters now. Why?

No I am not homeless and yes I have family were maybe this person doesn’t have family, so yes I am lucky. But being a writer this is what we fear most, is it not? To quit our jobs, write that book and be the biggest seller that your heart could even take. How bout them apples?

But what if it doesn’t work out? What if the hard work, sweat, time spent writing  instead of cleaning your home, or spending time with your children was for nothing? What if you loose your job, home, family until you have no one or nothing?

 

What if we are not good enough?

This scares me….. i am sure it scares most. At this time of my life, I have wasted most of it by being foolish, but now that I am getting this book done, it is a physical thing that I will see on the shelf of a library or in the hands of my proud mother. I am so confident that my book is not only interesting it is unique and awesome……….

But is it? I have set my whole life on being a writer to fail at every corner and now here I am. At the cusp of my success, showing everyone here that “Oh yea she really did write a book, I thought she was just messing with us!”

So Homeless man as a picture on this blog?

1.Something rude and socially horribly to capture a true American at a low point.

2.A way to remind everyone to give to the poor

3. A tasteless act to fill the picture at the top of my blog.

4. An incredible desperate move to think of someone elses misfortune this time?

 

Hmm who knows…. Or maybe Vet and God Bless where the biggest words on his board…. hmmm

Oh Joy the funness of Rewrites!!!

Rewriting the rewrite of the editing of the edit…… long and ongoing… but quicker then I thought. It seems that the edits are going faster and it is a thrill. Page 120 of my book is now page 144….. TEE HEE

I do a happy dance as I get weird looks from the family… Not much to Blog but happy thoughts…

 

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Rejection

So I think that when I am getting closer to the book to be done, the nerves are out. Not that I will get rejected because oddly enough, if I get rejected someone will eventually say yes. I also figured that if after so long I get no luck I will self publish.

I don’t want to self publish my first book… Is that Lame? I have a set of children’s stories that I might self publish but my first book is my baby. I wouldn’t just put my kids in the lion den and scream “dinner time!” So why leave the publishing and the final edit up to me, the author who already feels that I am a writer God.. I am like a doctor with a god complex except I like to kill my people… No I gave up being a nurse– so no worries.

My husband says my writing is good but he also likes me sometimes sooooo… Well I have accomplished my blog for the day so yaaaaa.. Nite all and don’t forget that if I like you I promise I wont kill you off on the first chapter.

On top of things and on the bottom

So here is where I’ve been for a couple months now trying to set my own timelines and schedule, balancing paying job, kids, household and social life. So that’s my excuse for not posting….. all forgiven? Hope so, not sure if anything is read but I would like to think so. Besides not doing the important things like posting in my blog about my experience as a wanna be writer, but relationships are hard too.

If you literally come to my door, you have my attention, your at the hospital you have my attention… But you want my attention. Good luck!! Anyone else notice how hard that is… Is that telling me that if I become that famous writer, ill be friendless, spouse less, and judged against?

Do we judge someone as busy as us?

I do.. I am terrible– My oldest son doesn’t call me and I judge. My father doesn’t call me, i judge- I am a human person or at least I think–

So enough about judgy me…. I am editing my book and adding the corrections back to the book… Then the scary thought is…. how many times do i do this? Every time I get done editing editing rewriting do i edit edit rewrite again or just throw caution to the wind and “JUST DO IT” hmm

we shall see–

 

Well its always nice chatting with you all!!

 

 

Writing and Not Writing

So I decided to start my blog so anyone with the want or in my case the need to write and have road blocks in your life, know that your not alone. I have always loved writing but life has always been my road block. Now it’s my son of 12 years who is just about to be 13 and “doesn’t care” about anything. I know he does but getting him to get unstuck is always difficult.

I decided no matter what, to start writing consistently 2 or more days per week. On  Sunday I write at home in the morning no matter if my son is at his dads or not. I then write at the coffee shop as soon as I drop my husband off at work at 6:45am until whenever I feel that I need to leave. (usually until noon or 1pm)

I wrote a book when I was younger, which helped me survive a life that was a bit hard. But between hanging out with the wrong crowd, family who doesn’t care too much about if your going to be OK or not and making bad choices about unprotected sex, that book remained locked in a 9 year old’s mind. I attempted at a time in my life to rewrite that story but without solid story background and my oldest who was a handful, I was told by my friend (be careful–this can ruin friendships) that it lacked substance.

Heartbroken and rejected, I stopped with a big old helping of troubled child and writers block.

Now I am diving into the story again and it is going great… not all the time smoothly but it has its moment… I have the base of the story but getting it from beginning, middle and then end, that can be hard.

The other thoughts that I have is, am I a one book wonder? Will they all hate it? Am I not as good as I feel that I am?

I try to remove those thoughts because I love to write and even if I self publish (I would prefer not too) I will.

I am excited about this trip that I am going on and I hope you enjoy coming along with the ride.

 

Lovingly yours

My writer self